I have to start this out with a resounding THANK YOU to all of you who have sent positive letters pertaining to the article posted yesterday. Its been overwhelming how many stories have been shared since I conceived this blog; but yesterday was the frosting on the forbidden cake. While I don’t know many of you, have never spoken to you face-to-face, nor have I experienced many of the pains to which you shared; know that I love you all. That I am here for you anytime, and that I am going to be rooting for your health, happiness and confidence until the end

I couldn’t sleep last night. Not because I didn’t want to – trust me, this body of mine is ready for a full on recharge – but because someone came knocking. I’ve mentioned “him” in passing, subtle notes of his presence. But I haven’t divulged whom he is, what he is, or why he lurks in the night. A man avid in the swinger-lifestyle who has taken a “passionate interest” in my look. I still don’t understand why it is that men seem to be drawn to me in that perverse manner. Or why I enjoy it. Even more peculiar is WHY I succeed at this, rather than the normalcy of intimate relationships. This psychological mountain of mental fuck-ups is catastrophic, and I have yet to breach the core “problem” areas, so, this will just have to wait. My therapist can hold her lid on this issue for the time being…
We went for a walk. He spoke of people who would pay lavishly to be in the company of my “talent.” His used-car-salesmen scripture went in one ear and out the other, lingering for a moment due to his vain charm. He really is a handsome fellow, have to admit that. But they all are, those wolves in sheep’s clothing. I know that. I’ve experienced that. But we kept on walking…
4 am came around, and I strode back into my house. Sat on my bed. And felt nothing. No shame. No disgust. No fear or surprise. I craved tea. Wanted to watch movies. Not usually the things a woman feels compelled to do after spending two hours talking with a man involved with the sex trade.

I watched a season of 21 Jump Street. Not once did I regret telling this man no…